I don't think he will be a jerk if he brings out his best. To the contrary, if he deliberately cuts down on his speed, then he is being patronizing to women. he may as well not play mixed doubles if he is going with such an attitude.
The women can handle it. If they don't, none of them really complain either because they know that men can serve faster and there is nothing they need to complain about.
The Bryans have often "unleashed" their best, at 135+ mph, in mixed doubles. And, many guys serve at 120+ which is quite a bit more than what the women are used to.
But doubles players know that such serve speeds is not such a big deal in doubles and that proper placement on serve that fits with the strategy to win the point, is what works.